Dear Google, Thanks For Making Me Look Smarter Than I am. (Plus, Win a Google Swag bag!)

I am never late. Truly. If punctuality had a face it would be mine. If Big Ben were to speak he would shout my praises from the rooftops. It’s who I am, and quite frankly, with all the technology available at our fingertips these days, it’s even more inexcusable to ever be tardy again.

And by technology, I mean Google. Not only does it get me everywhere on time with Google Maps (except that one time, last month, when I decided to try another ‘GPS’ device and instead of going to Houghton – my intended destination, it sent me to Melville. And I was 90 minutes late for a meeting…with a brand new client. I’ve told you I’m never late, right? Lesson learnt).

Google has also diagnosed my illnesses – no, you’re not dying, you just have a head cold, pre-empted pretty much every baby question I have ever had, and given me recipes to 90% of my meals.

I Google everything.

Now don’t tell anyone, but what I use Google the most for is when generating finance documents for my clients. I work on fee structures, and every client has a different rate. Now, I’m good at many things but ‘percentager worker outer’ isn’t one of them. So, when my sister in law (accountant) isn’t available, I turn to Google for all my finance related queries. The poor search engine dives deep into the realms of science and maths and answers world important questions such as “what is the percentage difference between 506400 and 405000” (FYI – its 21) and “How to work out 15% of a spend amount”

So there you have it. My big Google secret. Next time you receive a cost estimate from me, and marvel at the mathematical magic on said piece of paper, just remember that it was all thanks to Google.

I don’t feel bad – even Isla Fisher in ‘Confessions of a Shopaholic’ had to rely on Google to get her job done

So, now that I’ve told you my Google Story, it’s time to tell me yours. And in return we might just reward you with something money can’t buy – a Google Swag bag, valued at over R5000, consisting of the following:

Your story might also be featured in Elle magazine.

How To Enter:

  • Share your Google story (How did Google help you land that job, meet that special person, learn a new skill or save you from embarrassment) with me via Twitter (@KateKearney) Facebook (www.facebook.com/rupertapproves) or Instagram (@KateNicoleKearney).
  • 300 characters or less, please
  • Make sure you use the #MyGoogleZA
  • I’ll pick my favourite and announce it here as well as on the Rupert Approves Facebook page
  • You have to be 18 or older to enter, and must have agreed to our Ts and Cs found here
  • Entries close on 16 May 2016

 

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To Thai For – Win One Of Two Experiences with Enmasse Massage!

Guys, I hardly ever do the spa scene. I am truly the most awkward spa-goer there is. Firstly, I always wear the wrong things, I feel completely lame in front of the therapist and I generally lie there as stiff as a rod wondering if my feet smell from the pumps I was wearing that day. Don’t even get me started on bikini waxes – when suddenly my cellphone becomes the most important thing in the world while the therapist pulls and yanks things that not even my husband has seen. So, it was with slight hesitation that I agreed to accompany some friends for a Thai massage this week.

I’m so glad I said yes though – because Enmasse is absolutely amazing. It’s not your typical spa – all burning incense and humming dolphins. It’s beautiful; dark, stark and minimalistic – with modern music, a tea bar and extraordinarily friendly staff.

CT Aerial People High Res

Assuming this would be the typical spa experience – where one emerges as oiled up as a Brakpan mechanic, I arrived suitably prepared with 3 day old unwashed hair. Awkies. One remains clothed and un-oiled the entire time. (Because, according to Enmasse, it’s not that kind of party). The massage process, for want of a better word, is neat and clean, there are no standing beds with head cutouts, instead the massage areas are partitioned off by white linen walls and patrons lie on the floor on fancy feeling duvets and pillows.

My masseuse, Thandi, was lovely – she didn’t even snort when I apologized for being fat. She simply made me feel totally at ease while she bent and manipulated every part of my body. I didn’t even worry about sweaty feet. Alas, the loser in me reared her awkward head at the end of the massage when Thandi left me lying on the ground. Do I wait here I wondered? Ya, I’m sure I wait here. So waited I did, as still as a plank. After 5 minutes with no return of the Thandi I started hissing for my friends. ‘Lauren!?” “Jasmine??”. “Guys?”. Eventually I stood up, only to find all the massage areas completely empty and made up. No sign of human life remaining. I skulked into the main parlour and found them giggling (not at me, they promised) on the couches drinking herbal tea, or ‘betrayal beverages’ as I now call them.

Check out their website for their offerings. They even do pre-natal massage which is something I desperately needed when I was preggers. Sadly, asking my husband for a foot rub didn’t quite do the trick.

So, even though I may have overstayed my welcome a tad, no-one made me feel uneasy. Not even when I dropped an earring under a chair and had half the staff on hands and knees looking for it. I am not kidding when I say I’m that person.

The fabulous owners at Enmasse would now like you to experience what I went through (minus the sweaty feet and awkwardness, of course). I’m giving away two 60 minute massages valued at R420 each.

Entering is easy:

  • Like Enmasse on Facebook
  • Follow Rupert Approves
  • Leave a comment on this post. Any comment will do, but I will be swayed by bribery of ‘You’re so pretty’ and ‘Gosh you look thin today’.

The Ts and The Cs and the thank you pareese.

  • Enmasse is located on Corlett Drive, Sandton. Winners must make their way to and from the venue
  • The competition closes at 5 pm on Friday
  • The prize is not transferrable
  • Competition mechanics must be followed in order to stand in line to win
  • I was only kidding about nice comments. Kinda.

As an added bonus. Enmasse is offering R100 off a massage for every Rupert Approves reader. Simply use the top secret code word ‘Rupert Approves’ when claiming and booking.

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WIN A Four Week Baby Reflexology Class

Maternity leave. A time filled with long lie ins, serene walks in the park with your sleeping baby, and endless cuddles.

Atleast, that’s what people think.

In reality, maternity leave is the most manic, chaotic 16 weeks of ones life, with very little time to actually get anything productive done. In between all the washing, cleaning, burping, feeding, rocking, crying, eating, sleeping, farting and second-guessing, it’s extremely important to actually get out the house and do things with your new baby (and oh-boy – have I done my fair share! – more on that coming soon).

Cue: Baby classes. Oh, sweet baby classes. Possibly the greatest invention since sliced bread Magnum wine bottles. Baby classes give the new mom the perfect opportunity to explore a world beyond vomit stained leggings and bottle sterilisers. They are also the perfect place to meet fellow vomit stained legging wearing moms and discuss everything from engorged boobs to post baby sex life.

If frequent flyer miles were awarded to attendees of baby classes, then I would be the proud recipient of a round the world trip by now.

One of the courses I attended was a 4 week Baby Reflexology Class, held at The Bub Hub in Broadacres. (Disclaimer – don’t ever go to the Bub Hub unless you are mentally stable enough to receive debt counselling. You might even consider selling your baby to buy all of the things they have in store)

Hosted by Sarah Vorster (she calls herself a ‘Therapeutic Reflexologist, Pregnancy Massage Therapist & Doula’ but I like to call her a ‘Magical bearer of wide smiles and cupcakes’). The classes were awesome – Over the 4 weeks we covered aspects such as colic, calming and comforting, wellbeing, teething pain, blocked ears and ailments. Apparently, the actions work just as well on humans as they do on babies, so I chatted to Sarah about finding the pressure point to win the lottery, get a full nights sleep and fix my Telkom line. I’m still waiting for her reply. It’s probably still pending due to Telkom issues.

baby reflex

Sarah was fantastic with the tiny babies, but it was how she handled us adults that really blew me away. There is no bigger baby than a new mom working on 18 minutes of sleep. She handled our farting, crying, laughing, napping and feeding offspring with the grace of Kate Middleton. Bless you Sarah for not judging me when I came in one day one after a ladies night, child in one hand and a litre of coffee in the other.

So, whilst I may not have learnt how to save the world using 5 toes and my finger, I have learnt how to squeeze a big toe in just the right way to alleviate Carters distress. And that, my friends, is priceless.

I’m so excited to be giving one of these courses away to a new mom! You can also enter on behalf of a mom who you think would love to win a 4 week course with Sarah.

The winner can pick from one of the following courses starting on the following dates:

2 September @ Simply Expecting Pilates in Illovo

18 September @ The Bub Hub in Broadacres.

All you need to do to win is tell me where on the big toe is the pressure point for turning water into wine.

I jest.

To enter:

  1. Like Boho Mamas on Facebook
  2. Follow Rupert Approves
  3. Comment on this post and tell me if you want this course for yourself, or a friend, and which class you would like to attend

Don’t forget to share this post and tag any friends who you think would like to enter!

Good Luck!

Masseuse massaging little baby girl's foot, shallow focus BR 1 BR 2   

BR 8

BR 4

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Ts and Cs

  1. This competition ends at 7 pm on Thursday 20 August 2015
  2. All entrants must check the blog post for the winner announcement
  3. Competition rules must be adhered to in order to win
  4. Prize is not redeemable
  5. Winner must be available over the selected dates
  6. Winner must make own travel arrangements

PS – You may have noticed the new Rupert Approves logo…. a massive thank you to the superbly talented (and dad-to-be) Don from Front Sky Media. If you need equally awesome design things…erm…designed, then check out his Facebook page or email him on don@frontskymedia.co.za

*UPDATE*

Congratulations to Kerry Scott on winning this prize! Please pop me an email to katenicolekearney@gmail.com so we can arrange your course 🙂

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Win a Photoshoot Valued at R2500!

“Please take a photo of Carter and me”.

This is something I ask my husband atleast once a day. Why? Because I have no photos of my child and I together. (slight exaggeration, but you get the point). I am always the one snapping the hundreds of people holding my baby, and capturing those tender moments between him and someone who isn’t his mother. I must have several thousand photos of my husband with the kid, and a few thousand more of my dogs, grannies, friends, friend’s kids and friends babies with my baby. Hell, even my domestic worker has her own album on my iMac.

Every now and then my husband does remember to take a photo. Unfortunately it’s generally at 5 am when Carter is lying in the bed next to me, when there’s dried snot on my cheek, my face is puffy and lined from sleep, and I look like this:

eileenwournos

Arsehole.

It may be the wannabe photog in me, but there are atleast a dozen moments throughout the day when I’m perfectly posed for a pic. TAKE MY PICTURE YOU IDIOT I want to shout as I’m lovingly gazing into my baby’s eyes, he’s gazing lovingly back and there are fucking violins playing in the background. But no, unless I ask someone nicely to snap a pic, it wont happen, and even then the moment is undoubtedly lost when I get a forced “Ok look up at the camera and say cheese!’.

So, it is with muchos excitement that I’m running this competition on my blog. This one’s for all the moms who took the time to wash their hair and apply makeup in the hopes that someone would snap their pic of them and their baby…and then were asked to hold the camera and take a photo of someone else.

My good friend – and photographer extraordinaire – Clair Fraser from Fraser Photography (you may remember her for our engagement shoots) recently did a photo shoot with me and Carter (and the dogs, but they are incredibly needy, so I’ll let that one slide). I adore these pics so much, and just love how Clair is with the babies behind the scenes. Carter had an absolute blast, and to thank me for it he delivered a gigantic poonami from hell later that day, but I digress.

Clair has kindly offered to giveaway a photo shoot, valued at R2500 to Rupert Approves readers. And if you’re anything like me, then luxuries like personalized photo shoots are almost impossible given the price of nappies, formula and wine. Three vital things needed when raising a child.

Even better – the shoot isn’t limited to a newborn – it can be anything from maternity to a family lifestyle shoot. So, if you’re feeling bad because the last time you updated your family album was in 2012 using an old Instagram photo, then this is the competition for you.

I know you’re busy (washing your hair and putting makeup on and all that) so entering is really simple. All it takes is 3 easy steps:

  1. Follow Rupert Approves.
  2. Like Clair Fraser Photography on Facebook.
  3. Comment on this post and tell me what shoot you would like to win (Maternity, Newborn, Baby, Cake Smash, Toddler or Family Shoot)

The winner will be drawn and announced this Friday (7 August) at 7 pm.

11 small Kissing doggies b&w small 6 small 4 light small 3 facebook 2 small 1 facebook

14 small 15 small

 The Ts and Cs

  • Winners must make their own travel arrangements to and from the studio, based in Fourways, Johannesburg.
  • Prize is not transferrable
  • Prize must be redeemed before 30 November 2015
  • Photoshoot categories are limited to: Maternity, Newborn, Baby, Family and First Birthday Cake Smash
  •  Entrants must abide by competition mechanics listed above in order to qualify

*update*

Congratulations to Mellissa who has won this amazing prize! To everyone else, thank you entering. Clair from Fraser photography has kindly offered a 10% discount to everyone who entered – simply quote the word ‘Rupert Approves’ when booking your shoot through her. The discount is valid for any shoot until the end of the year.

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Win With Forever New

The first 5 day week in ages and we’re all feeling the pain. I don’t know about you, but this week has been revolting. Work deadlines, traffic madness, lack of sleep and a fine for an expired licence disk on my car have left me very grumpy.

The only cure for grumpy Kate is retail therapy. Luckily for me the kind folk at Forever New have given me a 30% discount voucher off anything at their stores. Lucky for you – they’ve given me an extra one which I am giving to one lucky reader.

To win, simply comment on this blog post. Bribery wont work, but you can try.

The winner will be announced on Monday morning. Good Luck!

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Good Luck!

Ts &C’s

1. Voucher has to be redeemed at Forever New in Fourways Mall but can be used at any Forever New store in SA

2. Voucher valid only between 23 and 27 May

3. Voucher not valid on sale items or at Edgars stores

4. Maximum 20 items purchased per voucher allowed.

***UPDATE***

Congratulations to @RobsieM who has won the voucher – random.org has chosen you to look fabulous with some new Forever New goodies 🙂 Please email me with your details – katenicolekearney@gmail.com

 

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The Energizer Light Race – Ticket Giveaway!

Us Saffas have gotten pretty good at doing things in the dark – what with all the Eishkom power outages that we’re all too used to being on the receiving end of, it’s no surprise we’ve become adept at coping in a blackout. Hell, I once even attempted to boil water by precariously placing a mug over 2 tea-light candles. (Side note – it doesn’t work)

Doing Things In The Dark has even spurred a new movement in athletics – with Nike launching their Run Jozi initiative and now Energizer joining in on the fun. Last year I blogged about the Energizer Night Race here and here and this year, it’s back!

If the thought of running turns you off (yes, I’m talking to you friends with “bad knees”), then never fear, because this year participants have the option to take part in either a 10 km trail run, a 5 km walk or  20 km mountain bike. Even better – it’s taking place in Soweto with all routes illuminated by you and Energizer.

Diarise Saturday 10 May now – as this is an event you don’t want to miss. If you class yourself as more ‘water boy’ than ‘athlete’ then the array of entertainment on offer will not disappoint. Participants will be surrounded by the beat of Zulu drums and Pantsula dancers while spectators will be entertained by George the Beatboxer, DJ Milkshake and Laser Dancers. Come hungry as the food will be ‘local and lekker’ with options from local African cuisine caterers and shisanyama’s on sale.

As this is a night race (otherwise why would Energizer sponsor it, silly) the events start as follows:

Mountain Bike Race: 6:30 pm

The route begins at Mofolo Park and follows the wetland north to Dorothy Nyembe Park, circling this park before passing Sedibeng Restaurant. It moves through Dube Hostel then heads to Mzimhlope, before turning back with Orlando Stadium on the left heading to Vilakazi Street. It then briefly joins the runners and walkers along Vilakazi street before heading past Winnie Mandela’s house and back to Mofolo Park.

10km Run: 6:45 pm

Leaving the starting point at Mofolo Park, the route will pass Nancefield Zulu Hostel, go over the bridge at Dube Station and along the small stream with the suburb of Klipspruit on the right, turning left at the Power Park Dam and the Orlando Towers. It will then pass through Nomzamo Shack settlement, crossing over the railway bridge in Orlando adjacent to Orlando Stadium through to Vilakazi street before heading back through Dube Village to Mofolo Park.

5 km Walk: 7:15 pm

The walk starts at Mofolo Park, then heads into Dube village past the Ubuntu Kraal and Winnie Mandela’s home before crossing over the Orlando Koppie. It then moves onto Vilakazi street before heading back through Dube Village to Mofolo Park.

The prices for each event varies from R60 for spectator to R270 for mountain biker). To enter you must visit www.energizerlightrace.co.za

The good news, for those squealing at the cost, is that the lovely folk at Energizer have given me 4 tickets to give away. Nice hey? All you need to do to stand in line to win an entry (to a race of your choice – even you Mrs-bad-knees-I’d-rather-spectate) is to simply comment on this blog post and tell me how amazing I am. I jest – although bonus points for bribery.

To win – for realsies – simply comment on this blog post and tell me why you want to take part, and which race tickles your fancy. You then win a cool prize and save yourself some ronds to spend at the shebeen that night.

This unmissable event is a must for fitness lovers, Afro-chic partygoers and those who love the vibrant culture and history that Soweto has to offer. Get glowing with the Energizer Light Race and set the night alight. For more information, go to www.energizerlightrace.co.za

The competition closes at midnight on Friday 7 March and the winna-wenas will be announced on Monday 10 March.

Good Luck!!

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Update 10/03/14

The winners have been drawn! (thanks to a very nifty online number generator). If your name is below please drop me an email at katenicolekearney@gmail.com with your email address and cell number.

Ziphelele: 5km

John Kearney: 10km Train Run

Sasha Martin: 5km walk

Stephan Schlebusch: Mtb Ride

Congrats!!

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Win With The Energizer Night Race

I like to think I’ve come a long way since my first trail run, when I arrived at the venue, kitted up in all the right gear, headlamp on and about as confident as Mark Zuckerberg at a Social Media convention. Then the gun went off and I found myself panting after a 12 year old in converse and stumbling through the finish line what felt like 3 days later.

Trail running is a whole different ball game. I was used to flat roads, gentle slopes and dodging only traffic. Trail running involves precarious surfaces (think golf courses, rocks, rickety bridges and rubble). It also requires a lot more stamina due to having to concentrate every step of the way. But what. a. jol!  It’s an opportunity to go out at night with a bunch of people, often dressed like a bit off an oddball and run around forbidden spaces. Theres something quite liberating about dashing over the 9th hole on a larny golf course.

One of the more popular trail runs on the calendar is the Energizer Night Race which is now in it’s 8th year. So just like the battery, the event keeps on going (see what I did there?)

Energizer Night Race
Energizer Night Race

This year the Energizer Night race is being held at the stunning Central Park Trails in Jozi, on 1 December. It’s a Saturday night so there’s no excuse not to grab all your mates, family and running buddies and go through for what promises to be an action packed event (think 5 km run/walk fun races, 10km trail run, 12km team relays as well as a 40km mountain bike relay for teams of 2). The entertainment line up is a win, with the likes of Jesse Clegg (yes, ladies), local band Tokyo Groove, Code Red drum corps, string quartet ‘The Muses’, SA fire performers ‘Dreams of Fire’ and Laser X – a dance and laser experience show.

Sounds good huh? And from only 100 ronds to enter, it’s a no brainer if you are looking to be festively financially savvy. If you are keen to enter simply visit their website or like them on Facebook. You can also find out more about race and event details on these pages.

Now for the fun part. The super nice folk from the Energizer Night Race have given me two hampers choc-a-bloc full of goodies, to give to two of you. They are valued at R1500 each and consist of various Energizer items, an Enrista coffee hamper a Salomon t-shirt and a 32Gi hamper. Everything an avid runner needs before the big race!

To win one of these hampers all you need to do is follow @nightrace_sa on Twitter and then tweet why you need want to win this hamper with a link to this blog (I’ve shortened it here just to make life esier – wp.me/p1ZuF8-7Q)

I will be picking the 2 winners in the next few days, so enter as many times as you like, and good luck!

For a bit of visual stimulation, this is a piccie of what you can win :

Energizer Night Race Prize
Energizer Night Race Prize

Also, be sure to check out the video from last year’s race

Share your trail running experiences with me below – would love to hear them!

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