#KatesFavouriteThings – The Story of my Bachelorette

‘We started planning this a year ago’ Amy told me on the morning of my bachelorette – and I can believe it. Put three A type personalities in one room and you’re guaranteed that the result is going to be the best day and night. Ever.¬†

One of the things a bride looks forward to the most (apart from the obvious) is her hens party – it’s a day guaranteed with bubbly, friends, fun and spoils. My poor girls had a big challenge ahead of them though. I don’t enjoy nightclubs, I’m so tired of the Gatsby and Playboy theme and quite frankly, a plastic penis just bores me. I knew they had a challenge on their hands, but I was never worried, and it turns out rightly so – these gals know me inside out!

I was woken up to this ‘Love Actually’ moment by Barry. (Lies, I was already awake I hadn’t slept a wink!)

My 'Love Actually' Wake up message
My ‘Love Actually’ Wake up message

Knowing me so well I was greeted shortly thereafter by Amy with a cappuccino and a toasted sandwich as well as a beautiful dress to wear. We chilled and I got ready and then I was whisked away to destination number 1…

An art class with a hunky male nude! (sort of) ūüôā

Art Class
Art Class

I loved the class – we laughed hysterically at the 21 year old model, clad in denim shorts and cheeky grin. I also love how, at 9 am, a breakfast of champagne is perfectly acceptable.

After the art class Amy took me to destination number 2 – while the others went off on a secret adventure. Destination 2 was The Life Day Spa and we indulged in some pedis and chill time around the pool.

Pedis by the pool
Pedis by the pool

Cue destination number 3 – the ‘main event’

The Arrival at The Fourways Farmers Market
The Arrival at The Fourways Farmers Market
Pretty ladies in sundresses and hats
Pretty ladies in sundresses and hats

More bubbly in my ‘Big Jimmy’

Hello Big Jimmy!
Hello Big Jimmy!
Favourite Things
Favourite Things
Favourite Things
Favourite Things
Kate's Favourite Things
Kate’s Favourite Things
Kate's Favourite Things
Kate’s Favourite Things
Mom and me
Mom and me
Grannies and me
Grannies and me
Lovely Ladies
Lovely Ladies

The venue, food, people, pressies and effort was amazing. Pity I was too excited to eat becasue the spread was a stomach ulcers dream – pickled everything, Cherry Coke, licorice, Skittles, Cheese, sweet sweet cheeses, champagne, Marmite everything, a popcorn machine and so much more.

That night we went back to my folks for sushi, games, Bloody Mary’s, tequila and a quick change before we headed out to mystery destination

Beefcakes
Beefcakes
#4… (cue a small amount of willy and naked men – cos, you just have to!)

Beefcakes
Beefcakes
Beefcakes
Beefcakes

The perfect party planned by 3 incredible bridesmaids, my mom and a whole bunch of helping hands!! A day and night I will never forget

Bridesmaids
Bridesmaids
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The Proposal

This is our story – and sure to go down in the books as one with many laughs and comedy of errors!

A few months ago Barry – the then boyfriend – ‘won’ a sales award at work. Yay for us we thought as he claimed a free weekend away at a venue of his choice. In true Barry style he kept the destination a surprise, only¬†mentioning¬†it would be in The Kruger Park area. (I of course used every¬†available¬†opportunity to remind him that he couldn’t claim this as a romantic gesture, as it was a free holiday…Barry just nodded and smiled). We booked the dates, I took leave and we carried on as normal. A few weeks later I¬†happened¬†to be planning one of my besties bachelorette parties, and while¬†liaising¬†with the other Bridesmaids we decided on a date, booked the venue and bought the theatre tickets. Cock Up #1 – I had now double booked the bachelorette and our weekend away.

I first became suspicious when Barry reacted in a not-so-calm manner, and was seen sighing and huffing and puffing on the phone and email to his ‘boss’ to try reschedule. Panic calmed down to relief when the holiday was pushed out by a week (Shame, I had now added on an extra 7 days of panic for the poor boy)

The night before we were due to leave I booked a spray tan to test out before the above-mentioned¬†Bride-to be’s wedding,¬†thinking¬†that should it go orange (it did), tan my hands and feet an obscure shade of¬†tangerine¬†(it did) and make me look like Snooki (you guessed it) at least there would be no-one to see me on our weekend away. Haha, jokes on me. Cock-up #2.

Friday morning we leave for the destination – incident free apart from me whining like a baby about my post spray tan catastrophe tequila induced hangover – and arrive at a rather larny Rose farm/Spa/Slice of Heaven – Summerfields Estate. Ooh I say to Barry, this is quite nice hey – Your company has really spoilt us. Barry just nodded and smiled.(Disclaimer, all his work had to do with the engagement weekend was give him leave -the rest was up to him, and his 3 months of planing really paid off!)

Post (mouthgasm) lunch and quick nap we decide to go to The Kruger Park for a late afternoon game drive. It was fairly chilly and drizzly at this point so I pop on my comfy hoodie and granny loafers. As my dad would say – nothing brings the man out in me like the bush. Poor Barry (isn’t he lovely for loving me?)

We arrive in the Kruger Park after several confusing who-is-our-driver-what-the-hell-is-going-on-moments and finally hop on our game vehicle. Sans any other guests… Ding dong Kearney! After half an hour of driving and chatting to our wonderful ranger Pat, we pull up infront of a massive koppie and get told we can go up it to have a sundowner (we had a trusty 6 pack of Castle Lite with us).

I walk up this bloody hill to find a tatty old blanket and a bunch of daisies in a broken vase, knocked down from the wind. Panic stricken I point an accusatory finger at Barry and to the offering in front of me and say ‘What The F*ck Is This!?’. Barry looks back at me with such¬†confusion¬†on his face that any inkling of a proposal evaporated. (Turns out the folk at the Kruger Park had added the ‘rock picnic’ in – much to even Barrys surprise.)

So, Cock-up up #3 is now the ring is in the backpack in the game vehicle, and we are standing on top of said hill like awkward fairies. ‘Let me go get your phone’ says Barry. ‘No babe, we dont need it’ I say. This goes on for a few seconds until he shouts in satisfaction ‘Instagram, you need to Instagram!’ and promptly runs back to the vehicle. All the while our game ranger is animal spotting with his rifle and¬†pretending¬†to ignore us’

I wont go into the whole proposal part, just to say that despite the sweet but slightly tacky efforts from the Park (they even threw in a bottle of JC Le Roux, despite requests from my now fiance to send ANYTHING but JC) it was a proposal that couldn’t have suited me better. The bush, my love and some wonderful stories to tell for many years to come!

PS – Glad to report that while I still looked like an Oros man, the rest of the weekend went off as smoothly as could be and I managed to drink my body weight (a skill!) in delicious bubbly and tequila.

Happy days!

The Rock On The Rock
The Rock On The Rock

Celebrations
Celebrations

 

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